Monday, August 17, 2009

On The Difficulties of Urban Mindfulness

Taking the seemingly totally irrational approach, I thought the best way to start talking about mindfulness in New York City would be to talk about a very different city: Toronto. I just got back from a trip to Canada where I was presenting research at the American Psychological Association's annual convention, and I stayed right in the heart of downtown Toronto. Toronto is striking in a number of ways. First of all, it's clean and beautiful in a way that makes me question what a city should look like. On my first day there, I was scouring around for what New York has taught me is a trashcan - a little grated metal bin often overflowing (especially in dear Flatbush) with 7up drizzle and coffee cups and fried chicken combo plate remnants. I couldn't find one, but Downtown Yonge was somehow spotless. Not a ketchup packet to be seen. I thought- oh my God, Canadians are so eco-friendly, they must carry their trash with them all day and throw it out when they get home! No one is spitting and chucking drumsticks and ciggaratte buts on the street? Are they human? Finally I figured out that trashcans in Toronto are large rectangular bins where you can choose Paper, Plastic, or Rubbish. Every trash can comes with recycling options.

Yeah.

And the food was amazing, varied, and very vegetarian friendly at every level of cuisine. I dined fine a few times (BTW, Thaione on has some of the most innovative Thai dishes I've ever tried. Go for the Coconut Cashew Vegetables the next time you're in the area if you like it sweet.) and found plenty of veggie fare for me everywhere I went. But even the cart food is vegetarian friendly! Every single hot dog stand - and there were hot dog stands everywhere for some reason - offered 100% veggie hot dogs, with nearly a dozen toppings to choose from to sauce your meal with. So much for dry falafels with tahini and a mound of lettuce- this was personalized, and in my opinion, really good meat free street food.

But that is nothing, really, in comparison to the city itself. Oh, the aesthetics of that city. Every building was beautiful in a different way. I can't really describe it- you'll have to go there and be mindful of it for yourself. The infrastructure is in itself a work of art. I found myself thinking, as I took the subway (where a screen in the station tells you exactly how many minutes until the next train arrives, and the stop announcements are noticeably automated rather than yelled at you over a half-broken speaker system): if every city paid as much attention to beauty as to utility as Toronto seems to, well, everything would be different. The world would be revitalized. Because, if you ask me, beauty is transformative. And a society recognizing that is a society moving forward.

I digress.

The point is, several scratchy muttered subway announcements and a few overflowing trash cans later, I arrived back in Brooklyn, thinking about how challenging it is to be mindful here. Do we want to see all of it? Or just go to the Met for our prearranged by "donation" beauty (nothing against museums; the ROM was fantastic, thumbs up Toronto) and fancy restaurants for our cleanliness? What does it mean to live in a city where the bench I'm trying to read a book on smells strange and the woman next to me is feeding her infant child Mcdonalds french fries and Hawaiian punch through a straw? ... Yes, I actually witnessed that happen.

That's where New York City has a lot to offer, though. The challenge of holding all of it in our awareness with compassion, rather than bitterness and discontent, opens new doors. It stretches our craving for and ability to see and experience beauty. And I suppose that is what this is all about. Because New York is no Toronto. It's a rough, vibrant, dirty, bustling catastrophe, and a really hard place to just be in. But, rough edges and all, I adore it. The longer I live in this city, the more in love I fall with it, and the deeper I dive, the more I find there is.

So, considering that, as Iron and Wine puts it, our life is composed of endless numbered days, I'm trying lately to wake up a little less cynical, a little more aware, and most importantly, devoted to my intention: dive deep.

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